Pete Yorn

A big HELLOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO to Planet Earth and to all my fellow breathing Earthlings!

Have I mentioned that I like Pete Yorn? I am not too sure, but I am too lazy to scroll down and check if I openly declared that sometime ago.

Fatima claims that Pete Yorn is one of the most boring living persons on Earth. Then again, if you scroll down Fatima's playlist...I was utterly astounded and disappointed with some of the songs she has on her playlist.

Well, sometimes Pete (yes, I like the whole first name basis thing) does get a bit, you know, melancholic for no reason at all, and sometimes some of his songs are perfect as soundtracks for when people die in TV shows. But otherwise, his songs give me chills.

Nice and wanted chills, I would like to add, like the sort of chill you would get when bungee-jumping for the first time. Which might be a bad comparison considering I have no idea how it feels like to bungee-jump, for most people it is a pretty terrifying experience, so Pete Yorn might not feel very comforted by that.

Right now, I have got one eyeball on the Valencia-Atleti match showing on TV, and the other eyeball firmly fixed on Dwayne, my laptop.

I think I called it Dwayne anyway...VILLAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA! AMUUUUUUUUUUNT!

Why is Villa not celebrating? I mean, the Valencia guy over the loudspeaker is howling in glee as if his heart is going to leap out of his chest any minute now, and there Villa is, looking unimpressed with himself and with the world around him.

Does this mean Villa will be leaving the Mestalla?

Everyone says that Villa, Silva and Joaquin will leave Valencia. And I am starting to get even more suspicious. And that is because I am naturally suspicious. But that is not the point.

For one thing, Villa does not look happy anymore.

All right, he smiles sometimes, like last week when the Valencia players were playing with water on their training pitch.

Don't ask me why that was so enjoyable for them, the way they acted that day, you would think that these players have never showered with water before.

See, just when I typed that, there he goes, dragging his feet across the pitch and scowling as if there was a skunk perched on his head.

And then, there is Silva. The lovely, wonderful, talented, and tiny Silva. The Silva who is always doing stupid (yet I must admit, very amusing) things during matches, like running across pitches to give referees a piece of his mind and then getting sent off after merely exercising his right to free speech. Sometimes, he just doesn't know when to keep his mouth closed, which is sad because at 22, he should know that by now. And when the time comes for him to open his mouth, like during group interviews, he pretends he is a potted plant and keeps silent.

Joaquin just did something very selfish. And Villa just shot him THE LOOK of death.

If you have been following Villa, you would know what I mean. Villa is the grand old master of fierce looks, I think it has something to do with that hair thing under his lip, it sort of makes his face a lot more threatening. Like a cult symbol you know? Our national army soldiers might want to take note of Villa's style, imagine how many enemies we can scare away without even having to touch our rifles.

SO, what was I saying about Silva?

Yes. The cameras have been zooming in on him every 10 seconds in the Atleti match, and I am starting to think it might be his last match for Valencia, that is why the cameraman is being so odd and constantly following him around, for no reason at all. All he does is run, and flick his hair, and open and close his mouth to breathe, and the cameras zoom in on him as if he is doing something remotely life-changing. Possibly they are trying to catch his last few moments in a Valencia shirt?

Could it be that the cameraman likes Silva's pores, like me? However, I do not like to be reminded of how his pores look like every 10 seconds, as fascinating as they are.

And then there is Joaquin. The resident ha-ha man of Valencia. Ha-ha in the sense that it is very easy to just look at him and laugh to yourself, because he is entirely amusing without even having to open his mouth.

Or it might just be me.

I don't want any of these 3 dudes to leave. Villa and Silva have announced very grandly that they do not wish to leave unless they are being forced to...Ze Castro on the floor! Ze Castro on the floor!

I have a soft spot for Ze Castro, he is an Atleti defender and I have always found him fascinating. If you go back a few thousand pages, you might even find the back of his head in a picture I put up of him and Fernando Torres, back in happy Fernando-Atleti times.

Alexis is on the floor now.

To be exact, I should say GROUND instead of FLOOR...oh dear! Alexis is being wrapped up in a blanket, like a cocoon. It must be time for him to turn into a butterfly.

WHY IS HE BEING WRAPPED UP LIKE A DEAD MAN?

ALEXISSSSSSSSSSSSSS, that silly boy, all he did was knock into somebody, somebody who looks suspiciously like ZE CASTRO, who I do not have a soft spot for anymore. Alexis has just gotten back from injury, and now he is being wrapped up like a corpse again? Iron man Ze Castro, going around breaking other people's bones, I am very disgusted by your actions.

On a brighter note, Banega just came on. You know what, I am very angry with the reports that Banega will be sold off this summer. We paid, what, 18 million euros for this guy, barely used him even though he is a wonderful player, and now we are shipping him off? The only reason why we are doing that is because he is getting into trouble off the pitch, on top of his whole adult film video nonsense. Which is, frankly, very entertaining, if only the management would see what potential Banega has.

You know, football-wise.

3-0. Villa.

He finally cracked a smile, after aggressively rubbing his palm on somebody's neck. If that is what will keep him happy, then I hope all his teammates will let him rub their necks on a daily basis. We have to do EVERYTHING to keep Villa in Valencia, he is one player I think we should keep with us.

Atleti is very unlucky tonight, so many shots wide, and Forlan and Aguero are doing everything wrong...WHY IS SILVA COMING OFF?

Standing ovation for Silva, BUT OF COURSE. Finally, some other human beings of the world appreciate THE SILVA.

Although maybe I imagined the applause. I was cheering and clapping so loudly to myself when he got substituted so it seemed like everybody else was hooting for him too.

Let's take a break from the football world and talk about my bore of a life.

1. Pearlyn bought the Boyz2Men CD.

It was such an impulse, I got up one day, with a purpose in my head, "GET THE BOYZ2MEN CD AT ALL COSTS!"

Dragged Fatima all around to look for their Greatest Hits album, BOOM, found it, bought it. Took me all of 1 minute to decide to get it, despite Fatima's silent disapproval. I really wanted that "Water Runs Dry" song...

Sigh. I rarely go on frightful impulses like that, usually I take an hour to decide if I want something, after walking around in circles for a while of course (that really helps in making decisions, try it!). But I cannot control impulses when it concerns...
(a) Football
(b) CDs
(c) Non-fiction books

Dweeb much.

2. Pearlyn meets some old old friends.

Most common thing I have been told this year by people I have not seen in a thousand years.

"You lost weight."

With different levels and tones of excitement from different groups of people.

With family members, like those relatives you'd usually avoid bumping into until the inevitable like Chinese New Year visits, they actually sounded appalled. Or concerned. It depends. Please, have they seen Nicole Richie before and after?

With friends, it was more like, astonishment. Or politeness because they have nothing else to talk about. Which happens very often, because I suck at coming up with polite conversations, so sometimes the conversation would veer off to a discussion about my apparent weight loss (and how I still look the same even after XXXX years...which is quite worrying to some extent). Either that or the course that I am doing in school now. I really have to sit down one night and make a list of polite conversation topics so I am not taken aback in the future...

I acknowledge that for most of my life, I looked like a pregnant walrus. The only exception being when I was a baby, I looked like a baby boar. I think I still resemble a walrus though, but looking at the comments, I think I now appear to look like a walrus who had just given birth?

Don't really care either way. Not really into weight issues much. People should not be so obsessed by such things, it's boring to think about.

3. Nothing else worthy occurred in my life to talk about.

AMERICAN IDOL TIME!

I caught some of the American Idol marathon they were showing all weekend. I will now proceed to throw in my two cents' worth of the Top 12, because I like doing such things with my time.

1. DAVID HERNANDEZ

First thing that comes to mind: Stripper.

Poor dude. I am trying to change the first thing that comes to mind when I think about him, to something more, well, encouraging.

Honestly, I thought he should have gone way further in the competition. His parting song was "I Saw Her Standing There" by the Beatles, a song that I myself like to sing...that's not the point, is it?

People keep saying he should have been kicked off the show. OH COME ON.

It's not like he committed MURDER. It's not like he did something gravely wrong. All he did was take his clothes off for other people. And get paid for it. If he did a good job doing it. Which he probably does, he has nice hips.

This discussion is starting to take a very strange turn, and I will change the subject before this entry gets forcefully removed by Blogspot.

Well, the main problem is that he mostly performed for males.

We're all humans, and we have no right to dictate what is considered a right way of life or not. Neither do we have the right to forcefully deny someone of the right to win a singing competition just because of his past, present and future.

But apparently that was why he got kicked in the first week, when other people obviously deserved that treatment more (not naming names here, because I have yet to find out what Kristy's full name is).

Who cares if he stripped for males, or if he stripped for earthworms?

(The latter would be a concern to me, to be honest.)

I don't even know how people found out about his past. But it is such a waste, really. To me, David H had one of the best vocals in the competition.

And the best hips.

Too much information.

Discrimination is heartless.



2. AMANDA SOMETHING

First thing that comes to mind: Hair.

Google her, go check out her hair. Kinda like Cruella DeVil (however you spell it, remember to check!), but the white is in front and the back is all black. The way I am describing it, it sounds disturbing I know. But you have to see it to understand what I mean.

Not one of my favourites, but she seems like a cool person. Just not my type of a singer, reminds me of Anastacia (HOW DO YOU SPELL THIS?), the singer whose voice pierces my head everytime she sings.



3. CHIKEZIE (Check check check!)

First thing that comes to mind: Suit.

He wore this SUIT that Simon really hated one week, I think it was bright purple.

I wasn't too horrified, knowing a certain person named Sergio Ramos has sort of desensitized me when it comes to bad fashion sense.

Chikezie was amusing at times, but to me he never really had that oomph.

You know, that ahhhh factor.

Like, I didn't go YOWWWWW when he sang. You know, except for whenever I stubbed my toes on whatever is in front of me when I am watching American Idol. Which is very often, coz I like to move about violently when watching TV.

But he didn't stick around much to prove me wrong.



4. MICHAEL JOHNS

First thing that comes to mind: Aussie.

Good man.

Uh. What else can I say?

Scandal-free.

Hmmm. Departed too early.

Sang that song that I remember from my childhood, "DREAM ON...DREAM ON...DREAM ON...DREEEEEEEEEAM ONNNNNN!" Good times, good times.

Totally undeserved. Because a certain person named KRISTY LEE COOK should have left instead. Speaking of.



5. KRISTY LEE COOK

First thing that comes to mind: Horse.

I am not being cruel.

She rides horses, that's all.

I don't fancy her. I thought she should have left in the first week, instead of a certain living thing named David. The grudge built up over the weeks, I regret to say.

Nothing personal, KLC, if you are reading this (which would be really creepy if you actually googled yourself under blogsearch). It's just that, I'm not into country much. I was very sad with what you did to the "8 Days a Week" song.

I'm not into country AT ALL, to be exact.

Her parting song was some Mariah song, which went on and on, something like, "UNTIL FOREVER...AND EVER...YELLYELLYELLHOWLHOWLHOWWWWWWL!"

Not a Mariah fan.


6. CARLY SMITHSON

First thing that comes to mind: Irish.

Followed very closely by tattoos.

The only girl I fancied, seemed the most genuine, the coolest, I would like to be her friend.

Plus, I have always said I would like to be stuck in a lift with her. I'm sure eskimoes would be able to hear her cries for help.

She sang "Jesus Christ Superstar". Stellar performance I thought. Memorable as well, because I spent the next week singing that every hour. It's like, I will be doing something random like, you know, arranging my CDs, and then I would stop and go "JEEEEEEESUS CHRISTTTTT...SUPERSTARRRRRRRRRRR...HUMHUMHUMHUMHUMHUMHUMHUMHUM..."



7. BROOKE WHITE

First thing that comes to mind: Gwyneth.

She ALWAYS reminded me of Gwyneth Paltrow.

A bit annoying at times, should have left instead of Carly, that is a very unforgivable thing in my opinion.

To give her credit though, I quite like the songs she did on the piano.

You know, I always wondered how people could sing and play the piano at the same time. Maybe it is because I am impaired in so many ways myself, and my coordination skills are null, and I am surprised that I can even clap with both hands without losing balance. But it always seemed like such a hard thing to do, to remember what you are singing and to position your fingers in a piano-playing way without faltering.

I have tried doing that. Singing and playing the piano. When I was young. 3 words later, I realized that my fingers weren't moving anymore and that my feet were never even on the pedals (is that what you call it?) in the first place.

It's like, singing and playing the guitar. Just that you need not do anything to your legs and feet, like when you are playing the piano. All your legs need to do is dangle off the chair you are sitting in a cool way, or if you are standing, then there is nothing much your legs can do. Of course, there are some brilliant people who can dance at the same time while singing and playing the guitar and jumping up and down like gymnasts. How come their nerve signals don't get tangled up or lost in their spinal cords like mine?



NOW I KNOW WHO I FORGOT.
8. RAMIELE MABULAY or MALUBAY

First thing that comes to mind: Filipino.

I was neutral towards her.

A bit disappointed with her "In My Life" rendition, because that is one of my Beatles favourites.

Nothing much else to say. She had some scandals but I would prefer to ignore that. Besides, after the David H scandal, the other American Idol contestants could get away with anything under the sun without anybody making a big deal.

Poor David.



9. JASON COOK

First thing that comes to mind: WHAT ELSE? Dreads.

One of the more amusing contestants, loved his attitude. I never really cared for ultra-serious people, so it was nice to see somebody like Jason in the competition, with his blank expressions and half-open eyelids.

Which does not sound entirely flattering, but he really is quite fascinating.

HANG ON, JASON COOK?

Forgive me, I am paying more attention to Valencia at this point so I am barely paying attention to what I am typing. I am sorry, Jason, for unlawfully marrying you off to David Cook.

Jason Castro Jason Castro Jason Castro, Fidel's lovechild, remember that.

He was...frankly quite dreadful in some of his performances. But I liked him with the guitar, and I liked him in the Mariah week. And his interviews were the most interesting of them all. Save for David Cook, who also tries to be amusing sometimes.

Also, Jason has Jesus Navas eyes, which is a very impressive thing to achieve.



10. SYESHA MERCADO

First thing that comes to mind: Afro.

I apologize for not paying attention to Syesha a lot more beyond her hairstyle.



11. DAVID ARCHU

First thing that comes to mind: Elf.

Come on, all of you have imagined him as a Santa elf sometime before I bet.

Or, it's just me again.

Find him a little boring sometimes.

Predictable.

Wrong thing to say, coz I ALMOST LOST MY ENTIRE ENTRY just when I typed that.

David A's a good guy.

Way too good. I can imagine him smiling shyly and singing to gangsters while they beat him up.

Because I am not above 50 or below 15, I do not fancy him in any other way other than his voice.

I don't know how some girls/women even look at him in sensual ways. It is all very disturbing for me to even think about.



12. DAVID COOK

First thing that comes to mind: Beard.

Well, I can't help looking at all the hair he has. On his face. Distracting really, because there he is singing so well and I am trying to find his lips beneath all that forest.

Also, HIS KNEES. I believe I have mentioned this before. I hope David C realizes one day how distracting his knees are behaving sometimes, they bend in very awkward angles, like he's got a muscular cramp of some sort. Don't know why the judges still have not commented on that, but I find it very uncomfortable, don't his legs ache frozen in that way?

Otherwise, he should win. If I have my way. I fancy everything about him.

That is, leaving aside the knees.



I have to get up early. Goodnight.

Signed,

Sincerely, Me

Pearlyn Silva



P.S. Valencia wins 3-1. Was hoping for a draw because I have a soft spot for Atleti, but I am sitting in a very uncomfortable position right now, which sort of impairs my emotional judgment. I will possibly feel sad only later.